Being aware in the winter

   Sometimes I find myself just wanting to walk around my house in flip flops as a protest against the cold, dark days of winter. There are moments when it feels like spring will never get here and I find myself making  a concerted effort to take in fresh air and catch a few fleeting rays of sun whenever the opportunity presents itself to keep myself in check.

     Even in 2015, depression and anxiety can be down-played, and if an adolescent or adult suffers from either or both of these, it's important to know what to look for, as well as steps that can be taken to encourage and direct the one you love. It's really challenging to grasp what it's like to struggle with an overwhelming sense of sadness, anxiety or phobia on an ongoing basis. The words, "just snap out of it," or "why don't you try and get some fresh air" are well intended but do not cure the ongoing emotional struggle. 

     If you notice a shift in socializing with friends or family, lack of interest in hobbies, a significant increase or decrease in sleeping patterns, detachment from the others, inability to concentrate, unpredictable mood behaviors and/or racing thoughts, these are a few signs of someone you care about not being in a good place. There is no wave of a wand to fix those we love, but through working in unison we can begin shifting things in the right direction.

     The first step is in having an informal chat about your concerns, what you are seeing and taking some time to come up with ways that they feel you might be able to support or encourage them. It might sound strange, but there's nothing wrong with asking if you can join them in watching a movie instead of them being alone,  taking a trek to Wawa for a cup of coffee, or even encouraging them to invite a friend or two over.

     I am a firm believer in providing the proper tools for those we care for when they need them most. Often, the first step can be found in connecting with an outside counselor. This can be a daunting task, but feel free to ask recommendations from family/ friends, your child's guidance counselor or through your insurance provider. It's challenging, as a parent, to not be frustrated with wondering why your loved one might be more inclined to speak to someone they don't know. There can be a sense of comfort in divulging concerns, fears or daily challenges with someone you are certain to not bump into in the kitchen or at Starbucks. There's a sense of anonymity when chatting with someone outside of your circle. 

     A counselor might recommend an evaluation if they feel it is necessary. Psychiatric evaluations can often provide a sense of relief from the unknown for both teens and adults finally validating that there is a legitimate struggle going on. It is through family/friend support, counseling and medication that the load they have been bearing can be lightened over time. 

     The world of mental health is vast and overwhelming, but it doesn't have to be. If you are concerned about either yourself or a loved one, reach out and ask questions to someone you are comfortable confiding in. This is not about being judged, but instead supporting and encouraging a healthier and more stable future for those we care for.