Freedom, flag and gratitude

Most of us out probably have Monday off and there are trips to the shore, family barbecues and opportunity to work on the garden. It's wonderful having a little extra time to recharge and enjoy being with friends and family, but let us not forget the meaning behind this holiday. As we grill, laugh with friends and family and soak in a little down time we are able to do all of these things because of the selfless sacrifice of the countless men and women in uniform who paid the ultimate sacrifice. 

As kids we said the pledge of allegiance in school. As adults we pause and place our hands over our hearts as we listen to the Star Spangled Banner at ball games. But do we realize the magnitude of our freedom? How often do we connect that our every day freedoms have come with a very great cost? The many men and women who have worn a uniform, swore to protect us and gave their last breath becoming the true definition of sacrifice. It is these men and women who are heroes and who we should honor every single day. 

Today I think of the many friends my father lost who served in Vietnam. I think of a dear family friend, Jared Leonard, who served in the Middle East. I close my eyes as I sit in my backyard under a canopy of stars without fear of gunfire, being arrested for writing my thoughts on this blog or the possibility of being stoned to death for attending church services tomorrow morning. 

As you enjoy this weekend and go about your day with friends and family take the time to pause, remember and give thanks to those who are no longer with us. Freedom is a gift and a beautiful thing, but it has not come without great cost. 

Possibly pills

Just say no is easier said than done these days. Our kids are faced with a myriad of choices on a daily basis and the decisions whether or not to succumb to pressures can be daunting. A dilemma we are now facing within our community is the gap that exists in defining what is considered a drug. What falls in that gray area is over the counter medicines, marijuana and prescription pills.  Personal definitions of what is considered off- limits and what is not are changing constantly and may not jive with the law. This gray area of uncertainty is creating confusion and opportunity for impulsive decisions.

Our kids have grown up in a media saturated world. There are plusses and minuses with this.  A negative is the access to drug trends, how to use substances and the means to obtain them. This is where monitoring what sites your child visits is crucial.

If you were to do a survey of teens and adults in our community the vast majority would attest to a friend or relative who uses some form of prescription medicine. Medicine can do wonderful things when used for its intended purpose, but with its presence comes great responsibility.

What I have found disturbing is the knowledge of and perception towards prescription medications. If meds are not prescribed to you then you are not supposed to ingest them.  But after thousands of commercials with little clouds following animated characters suddenly transformed by a pill, the message our young people are receiving is that when I’m sad, need a pick me up or simply want to feel differently a quick fix is found in a pill. Whether it be Adderall, Effexor or any type of Percocet many of our kids know that pills will change how they feel without realizing what it can do and that it is addictive.

Here are some key aspects to pill abuse:

•       Most young people access prescription pills from a relative’s medicine cabinet or from a peer who accessed it from a relatives medicine cabinet 

•       Pills are, hands down, the new bridge between recreational drug use and the transition to harder drugs such as cocaine and heroin which are both on the rise within our community

•       Teens have self diagnosed themselves as anxious, depressed, in pain, etc. then personally justifying self medicating with pills

•       Nationally, we are in a scary place with heroin and the vast majority of users started with oxycontin knowing that it’s a pain pill, but unaware that it is the synthetic form of heroin

As a community this is a topic that isn’t going away any time soon. I urge you to have a chat with your child about their perception of pills, what to do if they have a friend who is using and that medications can really do wonderful things when properly used by a medical professional that may or may not be necessitate counseling. Take the time to peruse your own medicine cabinet, see what’s in there and do what’s needed to make sure that whatever is in there isn’t easily accessible.

Reasons why students may choose to experiment:

•       Studying, trying to keep attentive: adderall or ritalin (it’s a stimulant so it has the opposite effect on someone without a.d.d or a.d.h.d)

•       Unwind, space out:  Xanax or Valium

•       Euphoria, high: Oxycontin  (synthetic form of heroin)

None of us really think that addiction can swoop in and claim someone we love, but it is something that has its grasp on more lives than we can imagine. But the stepping stone usually begins with gate ways such as prescription pills. There is no longer a ‘type’ of person that uses and that’s the frightening reality. I believe the more we talk about it, chat with our kids and guard ourselves in knowing how to deter access then we have more working for us then against us.

Medical professionals can do wonderful things, but be your own advocate. It's ok to ask questions. There's nothing wrong to research and inquire about what the scrip tablet might be recommending. Be informed and aware of the plusses, negatives and in-betweens of different medications and always be aware of the before and after feelings while on meds. There is a window of time for meds to be absorbed by your blood stream, but be keenly aware of any drastic changes and inform your doctor if you feel significant changes. Ask questions, be you down advocate and be in tune with your body. 

Knowledge is power. Learn about what's out there and know what you don't know can hurt you. 

A little bit of madre

I am grateful for my mom. Over the past thirty- six years she has taught me what it means to be a mom, wife and friend throughout the course of my life. It is not as much through her words, but her actions. It has been thirty- six years of phone calls and conversations of listening when I need an ear and providing a hug or a shoulder to cry on when it was needed. It has been the thousands of pancake breakfasts and home made brownies that just seemed to appear no matter what stressors were going on outside of meal and kid time. It was the opportunity to be loved in manner that now, as an adult, I am in sheer awe of. My mom provided the life long definition of love, commitment and selflessness. These are now things I am able to pass onto my own family. Recycling what was and now what is becomes pretty fantastic.

Books and lectures can inform us, but the examples that our parents or guardians have set for us and the examples we now set as adults can transform us and those around us. Sometimes the examples that some of us were given were not health, but as we take strides through the different chapters of life it becomes a conscious choice to shed the negative and embrace the positive. And if it may be that your examples were paltry and non existent, it is then the step to transform yourself into the person your future partner, children, friends, etc. would want you to be.

In the past ten years as a counselor I have heard some pretty heart breaking stories of loss, inadequate parenting and a million other things that have had serious implications on many hearts. My heart aches with these stories, but it only provides further appreciation and reverence for the woman that God chose to pair me with. 

As I think of the many in my life whose mom's are no longer with them it reminds me how very fleeting this life is. Every holiday isn't wonderful and happy for everyone, that is something life taught me at a young age. But each day, each holiday and with every year that passes I am grateful for the now and those I love who share these special moments. Embrace the now and the beauty of what was and what is. 

I hope you took the opportunity to tell your mom how much she means to you on this day, and if your mom is no longer here with you take a few moments to close your eyes and remember memories that bring a smile to your face. Memories are some of the most precious parts of life that are worth their weight in gold. 

Know your labels

Marijuana has been used in many forms above and beyond merely smoking. Whether it be in cookies, tea, brownies or in a pipe or bong it is being abused and isn't going away any time soon. What should cause further alarm is that the rate of marijuana being 

packaged in the form of candy (jolly ranchers, kitkat, etc.) and it is getting in the hands of young children with the intention of a sort of hook, line and sinker mentality. Dealers aim at reeling their clients in at a young age and hoping they become dependent and long term customers. It's a business. 

I've attached an article that I recently received on candy marijuana. Check it out. Knowledge is power. 

     Situational Awareness: Marijuana Candy

 Marijuana candy is being seized with greater frequency in New Jersey and in other states. It is dangerous because of its potency, and poses a particular risk to children because it is often disguised as hard or gummy candy or chocolate.
As with other emerging drug trends originating on the West Coast, marijuana candy has made its way east to New Jersey. The growing marijuana manufacturing industries in Washington and Colorado are seizing the opportunities afforded by marijuana legalization in those states. There are companies marketing THC laced candy and fruit on the internet as medical marijuana.1 Additionally, dealers in states, where recreational marijuana is not legal, are manufacturing it themselves.

PRODUCTION OF MARIJUANA CANDY
Marijuana candy is made with highly concentrated marijuana oil or extract. The hard candies are made like any other candy using corn syrup, water, sugar, coloring and flavoring. Marijuana oil or extract containing concentrated THC is added to the mixture. The oil is made by grinding marijuana into a fine powder, heating it in vegetable oil, and passing it through cheesecloth or other types of filters to remove any solids.2 Recipes are available on the internet.

 The process to make marijuana chocolate is similar. The homemade candy is made by mixing marijuana oil with melted chocolate. Large scale medical marijuana production is taking place in Canada, where chocolate plants are licensed to manufacture marijuana chocolate. Smaller scale production occurs in the United States in jurisdictions where medical marijuana is legal. In Colorado, where recreational marijuana is legal, some companies sell products with different concentrations of THC depending on whether it is for medical or recreational use. The actual amount of THC in the edible products has been reported to vary widely.3

 

DETECTION OF MARIJUANA CANDY
Even though the marijuana candy may not appear suspicious, it still gives off a distinct marijuana odor when the packaging is opened. Drug sniffing dogs will also be able to confirm the presence of marijuana contained in candy.4 It may be branded and wrapped in commercial packaging, which closely resembles other known popular brands. It may also be wrapped in bags or wrappers appearing to be homemade.

SEIZURES IN NEW JERSEY
  In March 2014, Ocean Township (Monmouth County), Police seized 18 marijuana chocolate bars confirmed to contain marijuana. Also seized were 3 items described as marijuana wax.
  In December 2013, Wall Township Police seized 10 boxes of marijuana chocolate bars confirmed to contain marijuana.
  In June 2013, Long Branch Police seized 40 red candy-like cubes, similar in appearance to Jolly Ranchers, confirmed to contain marijuana.
  In February 2013, Edison Township Police seized 3 “Dank Grasshopper” chocolate bars suspected to contain hashish and/or marijuana. These bars are sold by Grateful Meds in Los Angeles, California.

SEIZURES IN NEIGHBORING STATES

• Pennsylvania
  In October, 2013, West Chester University Police seized over 40 pounds of THC-laced candy from an apartment at the university. The candy was in various shapes, sizes and, colors. (Photo at right). Considering the time of year of the seizure, police were concerned that the candy could wind up in Halloween bags.6
  New York
   In March of 2012 on the New York Thruway south of Albany, a father from Massachusetts and his daughter from Queens,New York, allegedly drove around the Northeast selling marijuana
  candies at “jamband” concerts getting upwards of $10 a piece for each candy. When they were stopped, they allegedly had 40 pounds of cherry, orange, root beer, sour apple, coffee, butter rum, guava, and pomegranate flavored marijuana candy along with a pound of marijuana. The two were charged with a felony count of criminal possession of a controlled substance. 7
  

Color Me Goodness

I very rarely watch the news. It's a combination of impatience, self preservation and the lack of desire to hear anything else heart wrenching in the course of my day. Some might say it's ignorance on my part and I'll take ownership if that's the case. I do have my news apps if that makes me less culpable from. I read, but opt not to watch. My heart aches and my mind spins when flicking on clips of murder, rape, fires, large scale devastation and so on. It's a bit of an emotional overload after a work day largely revolving around emotionally draining stuff.

I believe emphatically that it isn't about ignoring the hurt, the pain and the challenges in our community. It is rather doing something about it, one person at a time. I don't believe in whining or complaining. All that does is fester and induce drama and gossip where it fuels negativity. No bien. We must choose the angles in which we want to make a difference and then do something. It's stepping forward and transitioning from words into actions. Too many of us rant about the issues, what needs to be changed, but very few take that step and transform words into actions. Don't chat if you can't act. 

So with that, I spent Saturday morning having my mind and heart yet again encouraged and amazed by the students at Seneca High School. Don't tell me kids can't change the world. Don't succumb to a cynically saturated media focusing on faces and stories of teens who can't or won't do anything outside of themselves because they are wrong. Close to 500 kids registered for our 2nd Annual Color Me Goodness 5k this year. It was all about goodness. It was them gathering to raise money for outreach programs at our school as well as funding for our their peers facing financial challenges assisting with our food pantry, offsetting field trip costs and making high school obstacles a little less daunting. It was a day of goodness.
I have to tell you, standing in a cloud of color observing hundreds of kids laughing, running and motivated for a very personal cause didn't nothing short of humble me beyond words. I am grateful. I am blessed. I am aware that our efforts and striving to make a difference can and will happen because there is amazing power in numbers.
Here's to a week of goodness!